How to Prepare for Your First Estate Planning Meeting with a Lawyer
Starting an estate plan can feel overwhelming, especially when life already keeps you busy. A little preparation before you meet with a lawyer can turn that uncertainty into meaningful progress.
At Commonwealth Life and Legacy Counsel, husband-and-wife attorneys Michael Winget-Hernandez and Lelia Winget-Hernandez help Central Virginia families with wills, trusts, powers of attorney, elder law, and long-term care planning.
This guide explains what to bring, what to consider, and what to expect during your first estate planning meeting.
Why Proper Preparation Matters
Getting your information together gives everyone a clearer picture of your goals. With that clarity, you can make choices that reflect your values and your family’s needs. You may also feel more prepared to discuss the next steps.
Preparation keeps the conversation focused and saves time. Your estate planning lawyer can move more efficiently from gathering facts to explaining possible planning options.
When you arrive prepared, your lawyer can offer guidance that fits your circumstances. In Virginia, details such as how an account is titled or whether a will was properly executed can affect the outcome. Preparation helps your plan address both the larger goals and the smaller details that matter.
Gathering Essential Information Before Your Meeting
Before you meet with an attorney, collect documents and details that reflect your family, finances, and wishes. The more complete the information, the easier it will be to identify planning options. Use the checklists below as a starting point and bring any other information that appears relevant.
Family Information
Prepare a list of full legal names, preferred names, dates of birth, and contact information for your spouse, children, stepchildren, and anyone you plan to name as a beneficiary. Accurate information helps prevent confusion in the documents.
- List each person’s relationship to you, such as spouse, child, stepchild, or friend.
- Note whether anyone was adopted or is from a prior marriage.
- Identify special circumstances, including special needs, estrangement, or ongoing support concerns.
If your family is blended, consider how you want property divided between family members or households. Virginia’s intestacy laws determine who inherits when someone dies without an effective will, and those default rules may not match your intentions.
Financial Information
Prepare a written list of your assets and debts. Bring recent statements when available. Ownership, account titles, and beneficiary designations matter because some property passes outside probate.
- Bank and credit-union accounts, including approximate values and ownership.
- Investments, such as brokerage accounts, stocks, bonds, mutual funds, and annuities.
- Retirement accounts, including 401(k), 403(b), and IRA accounts, along with current beneficiary designations.
- Real estate, including addresses, available deeds, and how each property is titled.
- Life insurance, including the policy type, owner, death benefit, and beneficiaries.
- Business interests, including the entity type, ownership percentage, and governing documents.
- Loans and mortgages, including approximate balances and lenders.
For married couples, note whether a home or other property is titled as tenants by the entirety. Virginia law permits spouses to own real or personal property in this form, which may protect the property from certain claims against only one spouse. Va. Code § 55.1-136.
The table below summarizes common documents and why they may help during the meeting.
| Item | Why It Helps | Where You Might Find It |
| Account statements | Shows approximate values, ownership, and beneficiaries | Banking apps, mailed statements, or online portals |
| Deeds and property-tax records | Confirms the ownership and location of real estate | County records, a closing binder, or a mortgage portal |
| Insurance policy pages | Identifies the policy owner and beneficiaries | Agent emails, policy binders, or the insurer’s portal |
| Business documents | Explains ownership, management, and succession provisions | Operating agreements, bylaws, or CPA files |
| Existing estate-planning documents | Shows what is already in place | Home files, a safe, or a prior law firm |
Bring what you can gather without unnecessary stress. Missing information can usually be identified and collected later.
Existing Estate Planning Documents
Collect any existing wills, trusts, powers of attorney, advance medical directives, and living wills. Your attorney can review whether the documents continue to reflect your wishes and current Virginia law.
If you signed a premarital or marital agreement, bring a copy. These agreements may affect inheritance rights, property ownership, and beneficiary decisions.
Beneficiary Designations
Review the beneficiaries listed on retirement accounts, life insurance policies, annuities, and other beneficiary-designated assets. These designations often control who receives the property, even when a will contains different instructions.
Consider whether the current beneficiaries still reflect your wishes. Marriage, divorce, births, deaths, and changes in family relationships can leave older designations out of date.
Tangible Personal Property
Make a short list of items that have significant financial or personal value, such as antiques, jewelry, firearms, artwork, or family keepsakes.
Consider who you would like to receive particular items. Under Va. Code § 64.2-400, a will or qualifying revocable trust may refer to a signed written statement or list that identifies recipients of tangible personal property with reasonable certainty.
Questions to Consider Before Your Meeting
Thinking through the following questions can help you enter the meeting with a clearer sense of your priorities. Brief notes are enough. Your answers will guide the conversation and help the attorney identify issues that need further discussion.
Distribution of Property
Consider who should receive your property after your death.
- Would you prefer equal shares, different shares, or gifts tied to particular circumstances?
- Are there people you do not intend to include?
- Would you like to make gifts to a charity, church, university, or community organization?
- Should beneficiaries receive property outright or through a trust?
- Are any beneficiaries minors, financially inexperienced, disabled, or otherwise in need of additional protection?
Your lawyer can explain how Virginia probate works and how certain assets may pass outside probate through ownership arrangements or beneficiary designations.
Choosing Fiduciaries
Consider whom you trust to carry out your plan. These individuals may include the executor named in your will, a trustee, or an agent under a power of attorney.
- Identify possible guardians for minor children and alternate choices.
- Select primary and alternate executors and trustees.
- Consider each person’s judgment, reliability, organization, location, and available time.
- Decide whether one person or different people should handle financial and personal responsibilities.
There is no single arrangement that works for every family. The appropriate choices depend on your relationships and circumstances.
Healthcare Decisions
Consider who should make medical decisions for you if you cannot make or communicate those decisions yourself.
A Virginia Advance Medical Directive may include instructions about medical care and the appointment of an agent to make healthcare decisions. Va. Code §§ 54.1-2982 through 54.1-2984.
You may also wish to discuss end-of-life treatment, organ donation, and funeral preferences. Clear guidance can help your agent understand and carry out your wishes.
Powers of Attorney
Consider who should manage financial or legal matters if you become unable to handle them yourself. Virginia financial powers of attorney are governed by the Virginia Uniform Power of Attorney Act, Va. Code §§ 64.2-1600 et seq.
Identify alternate agents and consider whether particular powers or limitations should be addressed. The attorney can explain which provisions may be appropriate for your circumstances.
What to Expect During the Meeting
Your first meeting is a conversation about your family, property, concerns, and planning goals. The attorney will likely ask about your marital status, children, assets, existing documents, and prior planning.
Communications made for the purpose of obtaining legal advice are generally protected by attorney-client confidentiality, subject to limited legal exceptions. Bring your questions, including concerns that may seem minor. Small details can affect the planning options available.
After discussing your goals, the attorney may explain possible strategies and recommend documents for further consideration. The next steps will depend on the firm’s process and the complexity of your circumstances.
A Virginia will that is not wholly in the testator’s handwriting generally must be signed or acknowledged in the presence of at least two competent witnesses who are present at the same time and sign in the testator’s presence. Va. Code § 64.2-403. A will may also be made self-proved through the statutory acknowledgment and affidavit process, which may simplify later probate. Va. Code §§ 64.2-452 and 64.2-453.
The consultation is also an opportunity to understand how the firm communicates, charges fees, prepares drafts, and handles later updates. You should have a clear understanding of the proposed process before moving forward.
Take the Next Step With Commonwealth Life and Legacy Counsel
Preparing for your first estate planning meeting can make it easier to identify your goals, explain your family circumstances, and understand the available options.
At Commonwealth Life and Legacy Counsel, we approach planning with the perspective of former litigators who have seen what can happen when estate plans are incomplete or unclear. Our goal is to help families plan carefully and reduce the risk of future conflict.
To discuss your estate-planning questions, call our Zions Crossroad office at 434-589-2958 or our Powhatan office at 804-598-1348, email info@winget-hernandez.com, or visit our Contact Us page.
Disclaimer: This article is educational only and is not legal advice. Reading it does not create an attorney-client relationship.